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Podcast Episode 281: 4 Tips to Keeping Quiet (and help your kids be more self sufficient)

It’s a regular day, and your kid comes to you with a problem…they were invited to 2 birthday parties this weekend and they are at the exact same time. They’re looking up at you with those big, expectant eyes, and your brain is screaming the obvious solution. 

But then, you remember—they are able to figure it out on their own.

Welcome to the paradox of modern parenting, where the mantra is “guide but don’t tell,”. It’s here that biting your tongue and keeping quiet has become an Olympic sport.

Every parent knows the pain of giving advice that no one wants to take. 

You’ve seen it yourself…your kid comes to you, explains their dilemma, and you offer your wisdom, only to watch them do the exact opposite, or give you a laundry list of reasons that your advice won’t work.

It’s like watching a slow-motion train wreck. The frustration is real. 

But by keeping quiet, you’re giving them the chance to learn and grow independently. It’s tough, but it’s an essential part of their development.

You want to fix things, save the day, and impart your years of hard-earned knowledge and advice. But alas, you must keep quiet while they must learn to navigate the murky waters of decision-making themselves.

Teaching your kids to be self-sufficient isn’t just about solving today’s problem—it’s about equipping them with the skills they need for a lifetime. It’s a journey of ups and downs, filled with moments of frustration and triumph. By keeping quiet (sometimes literally biting your tongue), you’re giving them the space to grow, learn, and become the resilient, resourceful individuals they’re meant to be.

Here’s to fewer meltdowns, more meaningful conversations, and raising self-sufficient kids who can handle whatever life throws at them—without us having to tell them how.

In this episode of the No Guilt Mom podcast you’ll learn:

  • Common frustrations all Moms and parents face when it comes to advice-seeking children who literally don’t want our advice
  • Ways to manage your own big feelings when you know you can’t tell your child what to do but the solution seems so simple
  • How to listen to your children in a way that makes them feel seen and heard without telling them exactly what to do
  • Practical approaches to helping your child through a problem without telling them what to do

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Brie Tucker

COO/ Podcast Producer at No Guilt Mom
Brie Tucker has over 20 years of experience coaching parents with a background in early childhood and special needs. She holds a B.S. in Psychology from the University of Central Missouri and is certified in Positive Discipline as well as a Happiest Baby Educator.

She’s a divorced mom to two teenagers.

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