Episode 002: The Real Deal about Kid’s Socialization during Distance Learning
We’re so excited to have Lisa Bravo, DBH, LPC, LISAC, NCC on the No Guilt Mom podcast. Dr. Bravo is an internationally recognized relationship expert and the founder of the BRAVOEffect and Parentworx Counseling and Consulting, and author of The BRAVO Effect: Strategies for Parenting Extreme Teens releasing in early 2021.
In her practice, she helps families heal trauma and build strong, connected and healthy relationships.
In this episode, we chat about how we can help our kid’s socialization and emotional needs during this time of virtual learning.
Here are the takeaways:
Your child’s success has nothing to do with academics.
Dr. Lisa Bravo says that kid’s success has very little to do with what they do in school. It happens way before that. The good thing about this pandemic is that everyone got grounded at the same time. We learned how to be families again.
We know how to be connected again. And that parenting is messy. So, embrace the messiness. “If you can just surrender to the mess, it’s going to be so much easier. It’s like it’s the difference between swimming against a current and swimming with a current.” Bravo says.
Read: One Simple Method for Kid Behavior Problems (that’s easy to remember)
Think about how you want to “be” with your child.
Parents get really caught up in making sure kids have the right supplies or sitting in the seat – but they neglect to think about how they want to be in the “process” with their child.
Bravo emphasizes that if parents are “really conscious about being in the process with their child, then the other stuff will just fall into place.”
The ways our kids are “difficult” are keys to our own wounds.
When we as parents ask ourselves “why” when we get upset, we can see where we are most in need of healing. Bravo suggests asking yourself “Why was I so upset when he said, NO!” or “Why did I feel hurt when he wanted dad instead of me?”
Be concerned about lack of physical activity, not time in front of screens.
Kids need to move and get out their extra energy. Since they also need structure and routine, it’s good to set a consistent time for physical activity. Maybe it’s biking around the block before it gets hot, going swimming or jumping in a pool.
Expect it to be messy
Dr. Lisa Bravo thinks that its unreasonable to expect elementary school students to sit in front of the computer all day. “Expect it to be messy. Expect there to be meltdowns,” she says.
Transcript:
Download the Episode Transcript Here
Resources and Links:
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These reminders will help you second guess less, and feel more confidence every day in your parenting.