Podcast Episode 353: Your House is Not a Democracy: Finding the Sweet Spot Between Collaboration and Boundaries (Part 1) Transcripts

Please note: Transcripts for the No Guilt Mom Podcast were created using AI. As a result, there may be some minor errors.

It’s not always about who’s gonna

I think immediately of mealtime. I see people saying you’re gonna sit there until you eat. Tried it, it didn’t work, especially with strong-willed

I’ve been there.

You could sit there for hours. It never worked.

Welcome to the No Guilt Mom Podcast! 

Hello, hello, hello. 

It’s a hard one. You gotta come in with all the energy. We went to a conference recently and it was all about identifying your charisma type and knowing what you need to put out there, especially in terms of if you’re doing presentations or if you’re trying to sell somebody on something, which I think as parents, we have to sell our kids on things all the time.

Yes. And what I realized and you probably realized about yourself too is I’m just very high energy. And sometimes when I try to sell things, I get very serious and nobody takes me seriously because it’s just not me. So like the high energy is good.

Speaker 2 (01:07.604)

just yeah I think that’s just part of our our personality. It’s funny you say that because just the other day I was talking to my to my son during dinner and my husband got up and left the room and so later I’m like hey did you think I was like doing too much? Well I was feeling uncomfortable I’m like what? He’s like basically I was too high energy for him and he had to leave the room. I’m like my god I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say that.

he didn’t say the words. You were too much, but it was between the lines. I was like, my God.

It’s hard. It’s like a hard thing with high energy. Like I’ve noticed this in myself too. Like if I am high energy and the people around me aren’t, I know I am annoying them. I know I am and I have to like settle it down. And like I get that way when I’m tired too. Like if I’m tired and someone’s high energy around me, I’m like, yeah, same. Okay. We all need to be quiet right now.

think a lot of people are, yeah.

Yeah, it’s just real, it’s realizing what you need at that moment. But today, actually, we’re talking about that sweet spot between collaboration and boundaries. I think it’s a really hard, difficult thing to navigate sometimes because you don’t want to be the pushover, but you also want to make sure that you’re respected and that your needs are fulfilled as well as the rest of your families.

Speaker 2 (02:30.216)

Exactly. And you know, it’s interesting because when we were coming up with this, the title, our initial title is Your House is Not a Democracy. And I read that and the first thing I heard in my head was it’s not a democracy. It’s a cheerocracy. Anybody? It’s a cheerocracy. Anybody know what movie I’m quoting? It is. 10 points for Joanne. Yeah, right. There is only one. It is only Bring It On.

Is that it? Bring it on? Yes it is! Okay.

Speaker 1 (02:54.68)

It’s only one.

Speaker 1 (02:58.402)

Yeah. it’s only, but it’s funny because there are so many moments that I want to say because I told you so. God. Yeah. Which would make the house a dictatorship instead of like that sweet spot we’re trying to do. I mean, just the other day, like my daughter is coming in sick to my office and she’s like, we’re just talking on Zoom, you and I, and like, we’re of course like best friends, but we also work together. Yeah. And she cannot come in and talk to me.

Adios.

Speaker 1 (03:26.412)

when I am working because she’s like, but you were just on with Bree. I’m like, you don’t understand. This is a work thing. This is a work thing. And she’s like, so you don’t love me. my God. No, that’s not it at all.

No.

Speaker 2 (03:43.25)

Get that so much. So just on Monday, my daughter, it’s normally, Monday is her go out after school day. I’m trying this new 90s parenting method where Bree’s not tracking her kids 24 seven. I’m trying to give them a little bit more room to spread their wings. So she’s allowed to go out after school. She just has to be home by a certain time. And she couldn’t find anybody to go out with. So she came home and she was doing that thing where you could tell she was lonely.

for your

Speaker 2 (04:12.568)

She was lonely, but she approached it the wrong way. I’m working, that’s because I’m in the living room. She thinks I’m not really working, but she walks in and she’s like, don’t say what you always say. And I just want you to hear what I’m gonna say and listen to it. And I go, okay, I don’t know what I’m stepping into here. Well, I wanna go shopping and I want you to come with me and don’t say you have to work because then you don’t love me.

Speaker 2 (04:42.336)

lapped down my laptop and I’m like, do you think I am doing? She goes, but if you choose work over me, you don’t love me. I’m like, my dear God.

that is like hardcore emotional manipulation there. Why are teenagers so good at that? That’s the first thing they go to. That’s the first thing. Well, we’re going to talk about that fine line between setting boundaries and being a pushover. So look forward to this episode and let’s get on with the show.

INTRO MUSIC

Speaker 1 (05:47.598)

Okay, Bri, let’s start in about this collaboration stuff because I think it really gets a bad rap when you’re first explaining it to people. They only have seen what they grew up with. They’re my way or the highway parents and you better listen to me because I’m the authority in this house. And then they compare it, Bri, to gentle, like, not like kids rule the show parenting. Right. it’s like, honey, you want this? Okay, here you go. You have that. Where parents are kind of like…

a pushover and it’s the kids in charge and that’s not what we’re talking about.

Not at all. I mean, I’m just going to say in my case, like I am labeled the pushover and my co-parenting arrangement. Like I am the Disney dad, according to my ex, because I try not to use the phrase because I told you so. That’s my house kind of thing.

Yeah, but then you also kind of fall into this pitfall of you’re trying to get collaboration for everything. And there are some things like we just described with our teenagers, they’re not going to agree with us on. Yeah.

Yeah, because I mean, they’ll sit there and be like, even not even just teenagers, the littler kids will be like, but I laid out a perfect reasoning. You can’t argue with my reasoning. yes, I can.

Speaker 1 (07:08.45)

Yeah, exactly. You’re the leader in your house. Kids need to have their voice. They need to know we hear them. When my daughter came in and she was sick and she wanted me to talk to her, I heard her. didn’t agree with what the next steps were because obviously I had to work. You had to work at your time. There’s just such a line to walk knowing that our kids’ development, don’t think like us yet as fully formed like

brain adults. Right. And that’s why like they need us running the show, but they also need to be heard and have their voices heard.

And another factor of that whole, need for structure is in any structure, we’re all going to look to see where the gray areas are, right? Like we’re all gonna push back on some of the boundaries, not necessarily in a menacing way. We’re just trying to see like, is this hard or is this flexible? And I think that a lot of times,

When we feel emotional about something, we feel like we’re being questioned. We feel like we’re not getting the response from the other person that we deserve. We’ll let that emotion jump in there. And a lot of times we’ll be like, how dare you question me? Like that’s just, no. And you see it as them trying, like your kids trying to be like this huge evil mastermind when really they’re just like, hey.

Is this always or sometimes thing? I’m just kind of curious.

Speaker 1 (08:43.501)

And it’s always interesting too, but with this approach, sometimes I realize I don’t have a good reason for what I’m saying. Yeah. I just like saying that because I think it’s quote unquote, the way parents should act. And that’s the things that my kids find right away. They’re like, mom, so I want to go to Black Rock for breakfast and I’m going to use my own money and I’m going to bike there myself. And I’m like, but I’m just scared like, you’ll be run over. I’m scared that like someone like, just scared. Like, and I’m saying that to myself, I’m not saying that to my kids. And when I realize like, it’s my fear that’s stopping them sometimes, that’s when I’ll take a step back and I’ll be like, okay, you can bike to Black Rock. And then five minutes after they leave, I’m tracking them on my 360. So I’m not doing 90s parenting there.

We all have to go in our own path and take our little steps of what those things that let you do it. I think that there is a big shift in the discipline and the collaboration portion of things when your kids are old enough that they don’t need you there all the time anymore.

Yeah, it’s just there’s a difference between the level of collaboration obviously with your kid who is under the age of 10 and your kids that are like 13, 15, 16, 18. mean, 18 is, oh man, I have 18 coming in a couple of weeks. I am going to just, I’m sure I’m gonna fail whatever parenting thing is going on when they turn 18 because I am gonna have a hard time letting go of that one.

Speaker 1 (10:28.344)

There’s no failure. There’s just feedback. There you go. what I like to tell myself. No failure, just feedback. Well, right after this, we are going to give you a structure for how you can make decisions as a parent and know how to handle those non-negotiables that you have in a way that’s really respectful of you and your child. So you really develop the relationship you want. And we’re going to get into that right after this.

So a few years ago, I was introduced to Dr. Ross Green’s work, The Explosive Child, and in his work, he talks about these three parenting plans. Plan A, Plan B, Plan C. Now, in our balance community, we have kind of named those plans to help people remember how they’re used and when they can be used.

Well, yeah, because I mean, plan A, plan B, plan C, that’s boring. That’s not us. That’s fine. We’re high energy.

And of course, you know Bree and I like to sing, so they all have song lyrics. So the first plan is come together right now.

just let me hang it all over me there, but that’s okay. And if you want to know, we are open for bar mitzvahs and weddings.

Speaker 1 (11:40.194)

Yeah, I honestly thought I might get the words and the lyrics wrong there, so I wanted to have you take it because you seemed very confident. So come together is like the collaborative approach that we recommend when there are problems that occur over and over and over again. Like this isn’t the approach to use if your child like just forgets his homework one day. Yeah. Don’t do that. But if they forget it several days, then you go into this come together approach.

And what it is, is it’s learning how to question your child, not in a, they’re on the hot seat, kind of like in trouble way, but in a way that you’re really curious as to what led them to that decision and what are the roadblocks happening. I mean, we have questions.

Kind of like a, yeah, yeah, sorry. I was going to be like, kind of like a, like a what’s going on. Hey, let’s chat.

Like, I see that this is causing you difficulty. What’s up? That’s actually the question that Ross Green suggests you start with. I see this is causing you difficulty and he specifically chooses the word difficulty. He doesn’t say trouble, he says difficulty and what’s up and leave it open for them to answer. Now, the first thing that kids who aren’t used to being questioned honestly or curiously will answer, they give you the look.

Give you first the look of, you crazy? Are you having this stroke? That’s the first look.

Speaker 1 (13:08.526)

That’s the first look. And then the response you might be getting is nothing or I don’t know. And then that’s where I think a lot of parents get really afraid. Yeah. they’re doing the wrong thing.

Yep. My big. Yeah, my kids like to do it’s not even and I’ve been doing this method with them for a long time, which cracks me up that my almost 18 year old will still answer when I say like, you know, what’s up, what’s going on? I almost always get the response from him of nothing. And then I’m like, wait, was that a question or a statement? Like, what? You know what we’re doing here? Stop acting like you know you’re 18.

Yeah, I know. I know. Well, some questions that you can go into though are what were you thinking when you were having this trouble? I used this like I started using this when my son was in first grade and he was like melting down over homework. And so after he stopped melting down, I was like, so what were you thinking when you were looking at your math homework? And he was able to tell me I just like, I don’t feel like I know this and I feel like I’m stupid.

So it’s a very interesting look into your kid’s brain when you start to ask them these questions, because you’ll see it’s not outright defiance. It’s not laziness that is causing them to do the things they do. Rather, it’s like issues of self-esteem and self-worth and confidence in themselves.

Yeah, and I think that a big piece too with that is no matter how old your kid is and no matter how good they are at self-reflection, when you’re overwhelmed, most of the time you don’t know. I would describe it as there are 15 tabs open in my head or no wait, that’s too low. There’s 15 tabs open in my brain.

Speaker 1 (14:59.108)

Five zero!

And one of them is playing like a very annoying like commercial and I can’t figure out which tab is on fire and playing music. All I know is I can’t get it to stop and it’s driving me freaking mad. So I mean like with our kids, a lot of times when they are having those difficulties, it’s going to be more follow-up questions, more follow-up. Yeah, like you got like, you get the nothing, you you need to give them space and then ask again because they’re gonna need your help to dig down.

Yeah.

Speaker 2 (15:31.618)

Like I seriously doubt like, right? Like that your son could have just jumped right out and been like, yeah, I’m stressed out about this. He just knows it’s homework. I just know that this is what’s making, I don’t know why. And they need that help.

Exactly. And then the second step of the collaborative approach, we actually have a little acronym called HAPPY for it. So we have Appreciate Your Kid’s Concerns, which is questioning. Let me back it up though because we forgot the H. The H’s have priorities, which we talked about before. You only do this with recurring problems because it takes so much time. Uh-huh. It takes so much time. And then A is Appreciate Your Kid’s Concerns, asking those questions, understanding their point of view. P is…

processing your own emotions. So it’s telling them, okay, I hear you say all this, I’m concerned about this. And it’s very short, very sweet. This is so you are not the pushover in this situation. Your concerns are getting addressed as well. And then the second P is for problem solving. You’re gonna go into this problem solving method with your kids so that you decide on something that they’re gonna try or you’re gonna try. And then Y is yield the work where you just let this problem

Be their responsibility instead of your own.

An important factor to remember on that problem solving piece is, again, remember you’re working on a collaborative model. That does not mean you give all the problem solutions because yours are the best or because you have them. You really have to insist that your kid gives a solution and that you’re not solving it for them because it’s going to be really hard to yield when you have such an investment in it.

Speaker 1 (17:12.078)

Yes, the kids need to have autonomy in it and they need to have choice in it for them to actually want to do it. And so that’s the essence of the come together plan. The next one is, let’s sing it, Let it Let it go. And that’s when you step back and just let things happen because stepping back will teach them

Let it go!

Speaker 1 (17:38.828)

better than stepping in. It’s like supporting them without rescuing those homework assignments that are forgotten at home. Yeah. If you don’t step in, if you don’t go and bring the homework to school and you just step back and you’re like, hey, that’s really hard that you left your homework here. I know I have a really hard time when I leave something I need at home. letting it go is so powerful. I see let it go, it could be handled so many ways. There is- Let’s make it-

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2 (18:08.564)

of top like top 10 situations where you think that you could handle let it go.

Okay, my son’s room. Yes. Where there’s all these clothes on the floor. That is something I let go. That is his responsibility, his space. I’m just going to close the door.

Yeah

Speaker 2 (18:28.206)

And be clear on that one, because I can already hear the yeah, buts, if a little creature were to run out of that room, Joanne would be right on top of that. That’s where the let it go has to change levels. But in terms of it, the room realistically just not being up to the standards that we feel like it should be, that’s different. And that is where let it go works fantastically.

And I swear that room toes the line.

That’s right. That’s favorite thing is shut the door. Okay, here’s another one. It’s very similar to the homework one. I forgot my lunch, mom. I forgot my lunch. I’m not bringing you lunch. You will not starve. Your child will not fall over because they missed one meal from you. The school will help them come up with things because if they don’t feel that uncomfortable, what’s the big deal? I’ll just call mom and she’ll get it for me every time.

Exactly. need the discomfort. Another thing I let go are clothing choices. I let them go because they are under my kids’ control. It is their body. I mean, there was a phase where my son was wearing two different colored socks and it wasn’t because it was a fashion statement that we played it off as a fashion statement. It was because he just didn’t want to find the other sock. Yeah. So he grabbed the first two out of his laundry. had that.

It’s similar in our house. My son refuses to fold or hang his stuff. so his shirts and things are typically like very, very wrinkly. Let it go. my Let it go. Not my problem.

Speaker 1 (19:58.19)

Let it go. So that’s let it go. And then the third one, and I’m doing this just for time because I think it would be fun to do all the let it goes thing. In fact, if you have a let it go that you think is, you know this is for your sanity to let it go, go and tell us over in our podcast Facebook group. It’s over there waiting for you. We’re going to start a whole thread on this as well. The third plan is…

is I want it that way

Speaker 2 (20:35.726)

Again, we are available for your next family get together. Yes.

The new wedding singers. This is the plan that I think most of us were raised in. This is the authoritarian method of parenting where everything the parent says goes. This is the one that most men actually default to. Where most women are more likely to go to the permissive side of parenting, most men are going to the authoritarian side, which is I wanted that way.

Now, just to be clear, because it does get very confusing with these parenting styles, we’re going for authoritative, not authoritarian.

Brie can admit I get those mixed up all the day in time. I’m like, wait, okay, if Erin, okay, which one is going on right now in the White House? Okay, sorry.

What? Authoritarian. That’s authoritarian, if you needed to know. I’m sorry. But authoritarian, the I wanted that way style, it’s actually kind of useful for situations where safety is involved. So if my kids were running into the street, you better believe I’m not going to be like, tell me, like, what were you thinking when you’re running into the street? Let’s collaborate. I would be like,

Speaker 2 (21:27.714)

Sorry.

Speaker 2 (21:47.096)

I’m problem solving right now.

Speaker 2 (21:52.438)

your booty back over here now!

Yes, exactly. They would be very loud. I would be very in control and it is the time to put my foot down for their safety, for everybody’s safety. That’s really the only time though I use the I want it that way style of parenting.

I say I do the same as well. So what I’m people to hear for this, first of all, is that we are saying there is a time and a place for that. There is, but that is the rare exception, not the norm go-to. If you’re wanting to have a relationship with somebody else that is built on respect, mutual respect, love, teaching them positive communication, all the things that you want in the people you meet in the world,

your neighbors, your coworkers, your family, all the skills that you want them to have. It’s a little bit of things.

is. Different text. It is. And we’re going to discuss how to figure out which plan to use at which time and how to actually frame it to your kids when you do have a non-negotiable right after this. So it can be really hard to figure out when you are supposed to use which plan. And first of all, I have to tell you, you’re not going to be perfect at this. You are going to mess up. You are going to make mistakes.

Speaker 1 (23:15.884)

You are going to have to back up and say, listen, I wish I would have handled that a different way. I do it all the time. I have to go apologize.

First of all, throw out that idea that we have to be perfect. It’s an all or nothing setup. Like if there’s one thing you’re getting from this episode, hopefully, is that we’re telling you there’s nothing that is all or nothing. Everything has a spectrum of ways to handle it. But again, thinking back to those qualities you want your kids to have, I would love it if people that make mistakes were able to feel secure enough to fess up to it and to be open to…

correcting it

Yes. Yes. No, nobody is perfect at all. mean, who are you talking about there, Bree? Could it be somebody who’s like, I don’t know, X-tra?

Speaker 2 (24:17.902)

not sure.

Yes. here are some general guidelines for making those decisions. The first thing you have to ask yourself is, can we collaborate on this? Can we reach a consensus? That’s the come together. That’s the first choice when possible. For instance, things that I have had to collaborate on are my son’s afterschool activities.

We tried activity after activity after activity and he wanted to drop out and drop out and drop out. I mean, we’ve been through piano lessons, through basketball, through piano lessons with a different teacher. Like all of these things that I had to step back, ask myself, okay, can we collaborate on this? While I want him to do is find something he is interested in, I don’t need him to stick with a specific activity. And that’s what I realized.

So whenever he dropped out, I knew that, okay, he’s gonna need a little bit of break and then he’s probably gonna get interested in something else again. So I collaborated with him and I also helped him figure out how to get into those new things. Like that’s something that is hard, I think as a parent because you kind of are a little bit.

At your kid’s whims when you’re pursuing the interests, for instance, when my son decided to go on to mountain biking and the physical was due like three days from then. And so I had to like drop everything, find a like urgent care and take him into the physical, get all the paperwork and all of that stuff. So there is some drawbacks, but of course I also have room in my schedule to handle that. Whereas if I didn’t have room in my schedule, I would of course not agree to that. It’s all collaborative.

Speaker 2 (26:04.822)

Yeah, I mean, and that’s the other thing. Don’t immediately shut up the fact that it could be collaborative because your kid is five or whatever. There’s still collaborations. Like think back to like when you had your toddler, like, right? Like when, and maybe you’ve got a toddler right now, so you’re not even thinking back. You’re thinking back to, you know, five seconds ago. But we’re constantly working with toddlers in a way where we’re giving them options all the time, right? So you’re working that collaborative bone.

You’ve got it in there. Just extract yourself a little bit more from the power of making sure the options are only your options. Like asking your kids like what their information is, like what their feedback is. That is such a huge piece of building their self-confidence, their ability to speak their mind and their ability to listen to others and to realize that in conversations and these kinds of collaborations.

It’s not always about who’s gonna win. It’s about how are we gonna solve this? And I think that’s a huge track.

Absolutely. It’s kind of like, I think immediately of meal time. Oh my gosh. Because that could be such a battle. of course, chores. But the, want it that way. It will never work for meal time. And I see people trying to make it work saying like, you’re going to sit there until you eat because there’s going to be no snacking later and all of this thing.

Sure.

Speaker 2 (27:33.934)

I’ve been there.

Yes. Yeah, I tried it for a little bit and I just noticed it didn’t work, especially with strong-willed kids. mean, they will wait you out. That is like…

Speaker 1 (27:49.022)

Exactly. In the case of that way, that could definitely be a collaborative approach. The way I’ve approached it is first, my kids usually don’t eat things because they don’t like it. It’s either a texture thing, it would be telling me to sit down and eat a plate of raw cucumbers. I would gag. I hate raw cucumbers so much. I hate them. If you’re thinking of, if you’re sitting down,

Cucumbers period so there we go

Speaker 1 (28:17.122)

Think of a food you absolutely can’t detest. That is the situation that your kids are finding themselves in when they don’t want to eat. If you think about it that way and you’re like, okay, I don’t want to eat this food, then how can we get into a collaborative solving process? One thing that my kids and I came up with is that having healthier snacks that I was okay with them eating later and that they liked as well.

And so I didn’t have to worry about them eating. They could just grab a healthy snack if they were hungry later. And we didn’t have to go through that whole like one-on-one who’s been at the dinner table. So.

gonna win

Let’s also throw this in there because I can hear the yeah. I’m the queen of the yeah, but I swear so I can hear a voice in my head of somebody in my past perhaps saying, yeah, now there no kids ever going to want to eat like their greens. So now you just gave them the hand to not eat any at all. Sorry, I’m not trying to like make an attitude towards anybody else. That is just literally how it was said to me on a regular. Yeah, is that it? But that’s not what we’re saying. Like you don’t like.

huh.

Speaker 2 (29:30.134)

it were just collaboration comes in at some point. At some point we keep talking about it.

Compromise. There’s always a compromise. If you’re talking about greens, I mean, like, what did my parents do? they put some butter on that greens or they put some cheese on the greens. And then you like phase out the cheese and the butter and stuff. And bam, you have someone who likes greens. Like I eat broccoli now. my gosh, it’s the most delicious food in the entire world. When I was a kid, it was covered in cheese.

I say no, say, nay, nay, you are crazy. I do not like broccoli still. How?

We are going to have to go through this because Josh did not like broccoli either. And then he went through this whole weight loss thing where he had to give up a lot of sugar, a lot of processed food, and he realized that his taste changed.

They do change, they do change, but I still don’t like broccoli. I’ve done the whole 30 plenty of times. I’ve learned to eat a lot of things that I never liked before, but I’m still not a broccoli fan, but that’s okay.

Speaker 1 (30:23.8)

Still like, okay.

Speaker 1 (30:33.582)

It’s like cucumbers.

Yeah, yeah. So there’s collaborations. And as they get older, things that you’ve done and I’ve done, we had our kids help cook meals. And as a result, the only rule was there has to be some kind of a vegetable with it. And then there has to be some kind of main dish or protein. And I’m saying it that way because both of our kids have made mac and cheese before for dinner. So anyway, there’s…

Yeah.

There are, you will bring it in people. You will bring it in. You will. child’s not going to just eat crackers for us.

I swear they won’t. So that’s the first thing. Can we collaborate on this? The second one is, is this a learning opportunity or do I have other problems I need to concentrate on first? Like that’s also something where you consider to use let it go. Because if you have like a child who,

Speaker 1 (31:31.03)

is not brushing his teeth at night maybe and is getting tons of cavities, you would probably want to focus on that issue first rather than picking up the clothes off the floor. Yeah. Yeah. So that would be a good thing to let go of the clothes for now, focus on that, get that good, and then go to the next thing.

Yes. And then the next one after that, and this is one that I ask myself a lot when my gut reaction is a solid, in my head I’m hearing no, because I said so. When I’m hearing that in my head, that’s when I have to ask myself, is this truly non-negotiable? Is this something that I absolutely positively cannot have them do because it is not safe for them? It goes against our family values.

Like, this a solid? Uh-uh. Sorry, we cannot negotiate on this one.

Yeah, yeah. And that’s where you use the, want it that way. And those are things of safety and things of like, I mean, I had a very recent non-negotiable where, of course, when kids get their driver’s license, they have that six-month period where they’re only supposed to drive in the car with one other non-family member driver. And I know, knew by watching my daughter, like she gets easily distracted when there’s other people in the car. She couldn’t see that.

She couldn’t see that. Yeah, I know, to drive down to Tucson with a friend to go on a college visit with my sister. What? Yeah. Oh my God. And she’s like, Mom, Mom, you don’t follow the other rules. You say you’re not a rule follower. I’m like, yeah, I’m going to follow this one because here’s why. Yeah. It is for your safety. And also, I am the one on the line if you are pulled over by the cops for any reason. I am still responsible for you.

Speaker 1 (33:25.282)

She’s like, ugh. But she’s getting better now with her driving skills and everything. That was a non-negotiable where I was like, I want it that way. It’s for your safety. We have covered our three plans and how your home is not a democracy. Now, this isn’t the end of our conversation with this because for the first time ever, we here at No Gut Mom have a two-parter.

Exactly.

Speaker 1 (33:52.152)

Catch our next episode next week where we’re going to go into specific situations and how to set boundaries and how to frame things so that you don’t come off like the dictator, more of a benevolent dictator, not really dictator. I don’t like it. I was like, you don’t come off like it. Don’t come off like it. But use this collaboration method in your own home.

I don’t like that word. Can we remove it?

Speaker 2 (34:18.126)

So share this episode. I’m willing to bet you’ve got more than a couple of friends that could use this.

Absolutely. So remember the best mom is a happy mom. Take care of you and we’ll talk to you later.

Thanks for stopping by.